Shabbat Shalom! Thank you all for being here. My torah portion is called Lech Lecha. I am going to talk about something that is not usually considered the main topic of this parsha - the relationship between Abram and his nephew Lot. By the way, an important note is that Abrams name is not yet Abraham at this point in the torah. That happens later. In this torah portion, Abram and Lot get into a fight, which in my opinion is pretty relatable. If you have siblings, you would especially know that siblings don't always get along. My brother and I get into a lot of arguments, some worse than others, like when he threw a TV remote at my face. Abram and Lot were on their way from their “Native Land” because God told them to travel to a land that God would show Abram. I am wondering, Why did they listen to God? Would this whole kerfuffle have happened if they just stayed at home? This is why I am talking about this part. I am curious about why they had to listen to God and why they went. I mean, would you go somewhere random just because someone told you to? I probably wouldn’t.
Along the journey, Abram and Lot get into a fight because of the limited resources of the land. The Torah says “the land could not support them staying together; for their possessions were so great that they could not remain together. And there was quarreling between the herders of Abram’s cattle and Lot’s cattle.” Then, the Torah describes what Abram decides to do: “Abram said to Lot ‘Let there be no strife between you and me, between my herders and yours, for we are kin. … Let us separate: if you go north, I will go south, and if you go south, I will go north.’”
So Abram and Lot part ways
I have noticed that when other people comment about this part of the torah portion, they have very different opinions. I read 2 modern commentaries on this topic that have different opinions that stood out to me. A source sheet by Andrew Pepperstone suggests that it was a GOOD thing that Abram walked away from the argument. Andrew Pepperstone cites a verse from the Book of Proverbs that says “Starting a conflict is like opening a sluice; Before a quarrel flares up, drop it.” That means before an argument escalates, walk away from it, or drop it. The second opinion comes from Rabbi Jeremy R. Weisblatt. He says that it is a BAD thing that Abram walked away from the fight, that it is better To address conflict directly.
Weisblatt said “It has always surprised me about Abram, that he hasn’t learned his lesson about conflict.” And, “ Abram has just left Egypt and Pharaoh behind, having nearly created an enemy through his deceit that was caused by his fear of losing his own life. Almost immediately after the conclusion of these harrowing events, Abram finds himself thrust in the middle of another conflict - this time with a member of his own family. What is Abram’s solution to conflict this time? Is it to rise to the issues head on? No. … Abram acknowledges the conflict, but instead of seeking to find a truly successful answer to the pains and arguments, he decides to split his family.”
I can see both sides of these commentaries. Sometimes a fight can be helpful or unhelpful. Fights are unhelpful when they escalate and are irrelevant. Fights can be helpful when they aren’t very escalated and remain relevant, like debates. Some examples of an unhelpful fight in my life was when my brother and I used to fight over who got the better spot on the couch, or the better blanket. Those weren’t the most escalated fights, but they were irrelevant because the issues weren’t an important part of either of our lives. An example of a useful fight would be a debate. I am not usually involved with them, but I think they are useful for a few reasons.
One of them being that it can help you see sides of a story or problem, and the other being that you can learn from them! In the world, trying to steer clear of useless fights would be very good for if not everyone, then most people. I think that people should have more helpful fights because that will broaden their knowledge.
For my mitzvah project, I wrote postcards to people in swing states to encourage them to vote, and especially in this election that was very important. My torah portion and my mitzvah project are related because they both involve arguments. Using your vote is a way to express your values and beliefs in a peaceful and productive way. In the lead up to this election, there have also been non-useful fights in the world like the war between Israel and Gaza, because war isn’t a helpful way to solve conflict, as well as useful debates, like the presidential election. In election season, talking to people and understanding where they are coming from, ESPECIALLY if you disagree, can help broaden your knowledge, as I said above. Engaging, rather than avoiding, these topics of great conflict and debate is important, but it is important to engage in a way that is helpful.
Not escalated for no reason. I think that voting is important because you give your voice in an argument, and I am proud to have done my mitzvah project on voting in such an important time.
My message to all of us about conflict and conflict resolution, based on Abram and Lot, is: When there is conflict about something that is important to you, it is important to address it calmly and respectfully. Thank you.
There are many people that I want to thank that helped me get to the place that I am now. First off, I want to thank my tutor, Tracy, for helping me prepare and perfecting everything I did today. Next, I want to thank Rabbi Aliza for helping me with this D’var torah. I also want to thank Hilary for making sure I have a great Jewish education, and my Chaverim school classmates for making that journey a lot of fun. I want to thank Ashley Addams for your great public speaking lesson. Finally, I want to thank my friends and family for supporting me through every step of the way.
Shabbat shalom.